I wish
I wish for nothing in particular
nor gold, nor silver
nor the slightest material star
Not even the love of another being
nor warmth from the sun.
I wish for nothing beautiful.
What I crave lies beyond words
beyond prayers, beyond faith
beyond me: it is dead.
It died on a Thursday afternoon
not long before the assent
to the peak of Christmas dawned.
I wish for the return of the property
stolen from air I use to breathe
– I have a nickname for it.
But the memory is punctured
the proper name dribbled away
beyond reach, beyond breath.
It refuses to respond to my cries
lets the echo fester and reek of cracked eggs
in case I forget it wasn’t always so.
I wish it was like Lazarus
reincarnated human.
Maybe I’ll go on wishing and breathing too…
____________________________
Note:
Composed just before xmas 2015. With special thanks to Lars.
From Bath to Cork with baby Grace 
Intense and sad. I’ve missed you on social media these past few months. Where did you go? -evidentress
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Evidentress thank you very much for getting in touch.
I went under the influence of depression & anxiety that got the better of me so comprehensively that I became “sociophobic” – from mid December until Monday evening.
Now I’m feeling much better.
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I miss you Paul
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Thank you Terri – it was good to hear from you. For the last few days I’ve been feeling much better
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I’ll wish that you find in its return the will to never stop writing
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Thank you Justin – it was lovely to hear from you – and to be back in touch with you again
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Beautiful Paul. Sad and real.. Like an aching, I can feel it pounding in my heart.
❤
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What lovely words to have read Jennifer. Thank you very much for them. Them mean a lot to me
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I love it paul ❤️❤️❤️
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